Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Randomize
