He is such a slut. More and more my type.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
and she was petting her beer can
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Randomize