mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
Be still, my beating vagina.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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