He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
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