Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
