We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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