walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
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