remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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