youre lurking in front of me
can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
I pour the whiskey from now on
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
