Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
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