im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
