I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
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