if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
