Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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