Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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