I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
