You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
