Nicole vs. Life
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
