I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Randomize
