If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
