I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
you had me at cake vodka
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
