PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
