Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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