ya dads aren't the best wingmen
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
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