Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
