Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize