member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
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