Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
pop tarts are not kleenex
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
