I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
