It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
