i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
