You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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