I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
I cannot find my penis.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Randomize
