I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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