6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
