Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Randomize
