I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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