Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
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