And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize
