I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Randomize
