ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Randomize
