If that was your dad, he is hot
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I wish you could order shots online.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Randomize
