Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
false alarm, still single
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
