Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
