Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize
