just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
