Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
