is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Randomize
