i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
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