This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
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